How do you know when she’s the one?

Is she the one?

We can tell you with a fair amount of certainty that spotting the wrong one is easy. Initially it’s looks. She’s just not your type, her hair is too long, too short, too brown, too blonde. Her body type is too curvy, not curvy enough and she’s a giant of a woman or a midget depending on your own stature.

But how do you know when she’s the right one? How do you spot that? Wouldn’t it be great if there was a giant flashing neon arrow above her head saying, “Hey dufus, don’t screw this one up because she’s the best your ever gonna get … and yes … she’s the one”. Or maybe an electric shock system that instantly focused your desire towards her and switched off your desire for … well … pretty much everything else on the dating site. Wouldn’t that be lovely.

But no, even in 2014 and with the most sophisticated online dating algorithms on the planet there’s still no way of knowing. So we males are left scratching our heads and wondering if we are staring at our once in a lifetime bingo moment of love. 

Okay so maybe there’s no big flashing neon sign, but there are small signs that could indicate that this particular catch might be worth pursuing.

1. Do you enjoy talking to her?

No this isn’t a trick question! Imagine 10 years from now when the romance has subsided, the bills are piling up, you’re both getting older and you’ve been through a few years of child rearing. Do you genuinely enjoy talking to her? Do you lose track of time or are you thinking about something else? If it’s something else then jog on because it’s not going to work? Sure romance will take you a certain distance but beyond that you’ll need to enjoy each others company and each other chatter.

2. Would you still like her if she gained 150lbs? 

Again not as silly as you may think. Over time our body changes shape. We get thinner or fatter and all our once firm bits start heading south. So look at her now in all her glory and then mentally age her by about 30 years. Will you still love her.

3. Do you like her mum?

This is obviously only relevant in the advanced stages of “Is she the one?” and you’ll only ever meet her mum if you get serious. It is however a critically important moment for 2 reasons. Firstly her mum will decide whether you’re suitable within 2 seconds of meeting you (mums just know). And secondly you’ll need to decide whether you like her mum because despite how she looks now, she will, sooner or later, turn into her mum. We aren’t aware of any scientific research to back up these claims but it is true .. trust us. You girlfriend will turn into her mum, both physically and in personality. Be warned.

So before you make that commitment or you decide to move on just ask yourself these 3 questions. If you get a single ‘No’ then it’s time to move on.